From My Desk To Yours...


When NOT to Apologize

Never apologize for feeling proud of yourself, or your accomplishments, and sharing it.Do I really have to say more? Ok, I will. Recently, a friend shared a picture of himself, because he was very proud of all the hard work he had done to reclaim his jaw line. But when he posted it to his friends on social media, he apologized for the moment of vanity in advance. This got me thinking… Why do we apologize for our accomplishments? For our successes? For our blessings or gifts? Why do we feel the need to apologize for the good things in our life, whether hard- or easily-won? What is it inside of us that feels the need to diminish our joy…
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What’s Your Schtick?

What’s your schtick? Seriously, I’m asking. And it’s something you should ask yourself, too. After my recent health scare (you can read about it here), I’ve been spending some time thinking about authenticity and what it really means to be yourself – to be true to yourself. What does it mean to unapologetically be exactly who you are? Now, “schtick” sometimes can have a negative connotation, but I see it as it is defined by Merriam Webster’s: “one’s special trait, interest, of activity.” I also like that it implies something routine or repetitious. Because who we are every day is a choice. Just as it can become routine or repetitive to be some curated version of ourselves, it has to…
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An Unexpected Treasure – A Story of Crisis, Perspective, and Grace

I don’t want to die today. That was the thought that was repeating in my head. Coupled with I might die today. In the past, I have had thoughts of dying. Throughout my life (mostly the angst-ridden teenage years and the codependent marriage years) I had, on more than one occasion, considered dying… thought about my death… about leaving. But I had never thought about not dying. Until two weeks ago. Two weeks ago, I very much thought about not dying… as I lay on a gurney in the ER, clutching my head, squinting my eyes through darkened glasses, and trying to absorb everything that was going on around me, and failing. There was so much noise from the other cases…
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Resentment and Intimacy

I was talking with a client about resentment a while back, and we explored how it can creep in unnoticed and then blindside us. Resentment creates a false sense of righteousness, which inevitably leads to more disconnection. That means: you cannot have an intimate relationship with someone you resent. Unfortunately, unaddressed resentment will always grow. So, it’s even more important to develop an awareness to it and not just brush things under the rug.

The Myth of Desire

If you have to chase, it, convince it, coerce it, or con it… it’s not for you. This is one of life’s simple truths. Is it always true? Of course there are exceptions. There are exceptions to everything. But the question then is: Why are you looking for an exception? Is it because you don’t want it to be true? Or have you actually genuinely tested it and know it not to be true for you? If you spend all your time pursuing that which isn’t for you – you will always miss the things that are yours, because you won’t be able to see them. You’ll be blinded to their existence by desire. Desire is a fickle friend, it…
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Inspired Moments: Words With Clients

Sometimes, when I’m working with a client, I hear my words, and I think, “Oh! That’s good. I should write that down.” And then I do, or I don’t – because sometimes by the time I have a pen in hand, the phrase is gone and I can only hope that my client wrote it down, because it was meant for them. The thing is, when you do this sort of work – work that is a combination of coaching, intuitive/psychic reading, energy healing, and a hint of psychotherapy all rolled into one – you are doing work that transcends any one discipline and is highly unique to the person at the other end of the line.  And yet… it’s…
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Just Add… MUSIC!

If I were ever to make one of those lists – you know the kind I mean, the ones that are in every health, lifestyle, and inspirational magazine – to share my “top ten ideas for a better ________” (fill in the blank), it would undoubtedly include: Turn on the tunes! Music has a transformative power. It’s like audible lubrication for your emotions. Feeling sad and want to cry? Turn on a song that triggers your tears. Feeling tired and unmotivated to clean or work out? Boom! Music is the best ‘pep talk’ you can find. Feeling stressed and overwhelmed? Calm or soothing music can relax you within minutes. Music is one of my favorite tools in my toolbox, because…
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Words for a New Year

Any transition that can be marked in some tangible way is a great opportunity to invoke a shift in energy and consciousness. So, as we move from one year into another, I would like to share with you the words I spoke last night from my bed (shortly before midnight) to mark the occasion. Thank you to the previous year for supporting me and providing for me with numerous opportunities for growth, connection and understanding. As I move from one year to the next, I leave behind any and all obstacles that would keep me from my path. I release that which no longer serves me and send it back from whence it came, or to where it belongs. I…
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Self Care Simple Truths

“Self care” has been a big phrase that gets tossed around across multiple industries. We actually had a class on self-care in grad school because of the high burnout rate among social workers. (It wasn’t mandatory, but I think it should be.) Of course, self care is easy to talk about and harder to implement, for two main reasons: Self-care inevitably takes time, and time is something a lot of people feel they don’t have or shouldn’t take for themselves, because We’ve been taught to prioritize our lives in a non- self care way, stigmatizing the act of self care as a luxury or worse, selfish. But, self care is neither luxurious nor selfish, it’s a fundamental component to our…
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The Role of “Family” in Relationship

Over the years (more often than not), I have heard story after story about how stressful family gatherings are around the holidays. In fact, there is an entire product-based industry capitalizing off this stereotype. (One of my favorites is a funny dishtowel I spied in my aunt’s house): Now, not every family is dysfunctional, of course, because every experience of family is highly individual. What may appear to be “bad” to someone else, is “normal” or even fun to the person experiencing it. I’ve heard stories of yelling, fights, and behavior that would lead an outsider to believe that everybody hates everybody – when the reverse is actually true. Then I’ve heard stories of happy peaceful dinners, where after the…
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