Category Archives: more love

Three Stages of Love

In my experience, there are three basic stages of Love. And they usually occur in this order:

love agaveBe loving. Simply stated: Love others and love yourself, through your words, thoughts, and actions.

Be lovable. This is not about being cute; it’s about being receptive to love from someone else. Surprisingly, this can be a real challenge for many, but I’m here to say you are 100% WORTHY of love, exaclty as you are.

Be Love. Do 1 and 2.

Ok, so #3 is one of those “wisdom statements” I referred to in an earlier post. It’s simple and true…and somewhat airy. Here’s how to make it accessible:

Let your actions, decisions, words and thoughts come from the space of love inside you. If you embody 1 and 2, you will “Be Love.” In other words, allow the idea of Love as an energy, a thought, a feeling, to guide you in your day. Use it as a barometer against which you measure your decisions. If, for example, something is out of alignment with Love (like gossip, for instance), you have a choice. You can always choose something new, something different. Always.

Some practical questions you can ask yourself as you choose to Be Love:

  • Is this thought coming from a loving space?
    (If not, where is it coming from? Fear? Anger? Hurt? – How can you change it?)
  • Does this action/decision support my intention of being loving and lovable?
    To myself? To others? (<– see what I did there? Put yourself first.)
  • What is the loving thing to do in this situation?

Life can be hard. Life can be a struggle. This is not about being perfect. If, for example, you “mess up” and say something out of fear or hurt (or exhaustion), love yourself back into alignment by apologizing, or making a different choice the next time, or whatever you think would be a more loving response than what you did. (I speak from experience here.)

This is all about engaging in the process and allowing yourself to make different choices, being more open to a life filled with Love, both giving and receiving it. Because Love is the essence behind everything you are, and everything you desire (not to mention: creativity, prosperity, and joy!).

Love to You

“Love to you.” My Teacher taught me this phrase. Initially, it kind of hurt me when he said it (seriously). I felt lesser-than, as if I wasn’t worthy of the “real” phrase, or, indeed, love itself. He has said, “I love you,” before, but most of the time, instead of saying that, he would say, “Love to you.” Now, I know he loves me, because he embodies Love; but I’ve been so conditioned to expect love in a specific package that I was unable to receive it wrapped in a different presentation. I couldn’t see the gift staring me in the face!

I now know, however, that “Love to you” says so much more than I originally thought. When we say, “I love you,” it is an “I” statement – it’s about me loving you. It’s not necessarily about the other person. For much of my life I rarely said, “I love you” to anyone, including my family. Sure, I signed my emails and letters: “with love,” or “xoxo,” or “love,” – because I genuinely cared for and loved the people to whom I was writing. But verbally I withheld the phrase, “I love you,” so many more times than not. It felt somehow “wrong” to me to say so easily. I used to think that it was because it was such a serious thing to say – but I realize it’s because it simply was wrong, for me.

Telling somebody that I love him or her isn’t necessarily giving them my love – it’s simply telling them that I feel a certain way towards them in that specific moment in time, which is fine. It’s great actually to be able to share your feelings with another person. But saying “Love to you” – now that’s different. It’s an offering of Love; love from me, from the earth, from the Universe — to you. The all-encompassing Love that is in everything all around us is offered to someone when we say, “Love to you.” (It’s almost like placing an order with the Universe – “Umm, yes, I’ll have one order of Love for this person, please. Hold the fries.”) No longer do I see it as a “lesser-than” expression. Instead it’s a blessing. A gift. I receive the love with open arms, open eyes and an open heart. I feel the love expressed in those three simple words, and I more easily can offer love to those around me using the same three words.

Do I still say, “I love you?” Of course! I do love people, and I’m happy to let them know how I am feeling towards them. But when I truly want to offer my love to someone, and the Love of the Universe, I choose, instead, to say. “Love to you.” Because after all – offering Love as a gift is the most precious thing we can share. Wouldn’t we all say, “Love to you,” more often if we could? Can we?

THree Things

Body – Love to your Body
Mind – Love to your Mind
Spirit – Love to your Spirit

Love to you,
In Light,

Martina